Humor

An advice column about life, love, classes, and everything in between! Brought to you by the one and only California Tech.

Of course none of this matters because you’re reading it online.

On Wednesday, June 7, 2023 at 2:12 p.m., Caltech undergraduates received the following email: Caltech Notification System This Timely Warning Bulletin is being issued in compliance with the Jeanne Clery Act. The purpose is to provide preventative information to the campus community to aid members from becoming the victim of a crime. Summary: On June 7, 2023, at around 7:30 a.m., while unlocking the Tournament Park parking lot, south of the Braun Athletic Center, Caltech Security officers observed a red Chevy utility van parked in the parking lot.

Dear Quail, In your holy infinite wisdom, can you answer the question: Is Caltech worth it? Best, A.S. Muncher

The Writers Guild of America (WGA) is currently on strike. The last time this happened was in 2008 and lasted around 2 months.

Joe interviews Doris, a 87-year-old very accomplished bike thief.

A new advice column about life, love, classes, and everything in between! Brought to you by the one and only California Tech.

The unprecedented high level of freshman enrollment has spurred a housing shortage on the Caltech campus. Therefore, we propose the following locations as new options for undergraduate housing:

A new advice column about life, love, classes, and everything in between! Brought to you by the one and only California Tech.